The Big Red Exercise Ball

This was the first of my college adventures. It happened long before I knew the girls in apartment 17, let alone lived with them and long before the guys in Apartment 5 lived in Greenbrier. It was my first semester of college when I lived in Apartment 9 with Aubrey Frandsen, Amber Bath, Sherise Rawson, Chelaine Hoffer, and Celeste Bath.

That semester we were FHE siblings with Apartment 1. They once told us how some girls stole their big red exercise ball and it had made them mad. They only had themselves to blame for what happened after that.

Amber, Aubrey and I went to Apartment 1 to return something. They weren’t home, so we did what any other person in Greenbrier would do, we just walked in. There in the living room in plain sight was the same big red exercise ball they had just finished telling us about. There was no way we could leave it there. It practically called our names and begged us to take it with us. We gave in to temptation and carried that ball across the parking lot to our apartment.

We weren’t quite sure what to do with the ball now that we had it, so we stuck it behind the couch. The ball peeked over the top of the couch, but we weren’t too concerned. However, while we were sitting there our FHE brother Jason Tonks came over to our apartment and sat on the couch directly in front of the exercise ball we had stolen from his apartment. We threw pillows over the top of the ball and hoped he didn’t notice. We nervously watched him, hoping he would soon leave. Instead, he made himself at home. He rested his head on the back of the couch and the pillow covering the ball slid off. We were terrified at what would happen if he were to turn his head ever so slightly and be face to face with the ball. Our good luck continued though and he never noticed it.

After he left, we discussed our options. Celeste suggested we hold the ball ransom for ice cream or something. Liking her idea, we pulled out old newspapers and magazines to make a ransom note. When it was finished, it read “If you ever want to see your red ball again, leave chocolate ice cream in the lounge freezer at 5 pm on Thursday. Then we will deliver it”

When Sherise came home and realized what we were doing, she said she wanted no part in it, so it was just the three of us.

When our note was done, we were too chicken to take it over there, so we went over to Apartment 7 where some of Aubrey’s friends lived and had them deliver the note.

Before the appointed day arrived, we heard our FHE brothers talking about how someone had stolen their ball again. We asked if they had any ideas who took it and they thought it was the girls who lived in 16 because they were the ones who swiped it before. We tried to keep a straight face and encourage them in their beliefs.

Knowing the guys from Apartment 1 would be watching the lounge like a hawk, we devised a plan to get our ice cream without getting caught. I would go up to the lounge and play the piano while my cousin Lisa who did not live in Greenbrier would come up to the lounge and pretend to study. If the guys from Apartment 1 where in the lounge and it was not safe to get the ice cream, I would play one song as a signal to leave. If the coast was clear, I would play another song. Lisa would then put the ice cream in her backpack and go the back way to my apartment and I would soon follow.

Our luck held and no one from Apartment 1 was in the lounge at the appointed time. Lisa took the ice cream and headed out while I waited a few minutes to avoid looking suspicious. Unfortunately, Lisa forgot to take the back way to my apartment and Jason Tonks spotted her and followed her. When I got there, we went to my bedroom to see the goods. In her backpack was a container of Ben and Jerry’s chocolate ice cream and a note saying



Unfortunately, the ice cream was half eat and Jason was still sitting in our living room. We put the ice cream in the bath tub since we couldn’t gain access to our freezer and we waited him out.

Feeling confident from the success we had enjoyed, we decided a half eaten thing of ice cream wasn’t good enough. With our helper from Apartment 7, we schemed up the following note and deliver it with a little red bouncy ball.

“So you think you’re funny…Well we can be funny too! This is all you’ll see of your precious ball until we see something a little more substantial to what YOU lost. You will take the ransom to #7. Do not ask questions. Do not say anything or the ransom will be double! Try to get it right this time. We demand 1 (one) full quart of ice cream. The ball will be delivered by messenger upon receiving the ransom.”

Good luck can only hold out for so long and ours came to an end. Jeremy Furniss came over and asked Sherise for the ball, stating he knew she had it. Sherise denied having the ball or having any part of the whole incident, but he kept hounding her. Turns out we had written the ransom note on the second page of Sherise’s resume and they were able to trace it back to her. Knowing the game was up, it was time to return the ball without the ice cream. We walked over to Apartment 1 and rang the doorbell. No one answered at first, so we thought about walking in and leaving it just as we had taken it, but Jared Mangum soon came to the door. He thanked us for returning the ball and we were free to go. And so ended the story of the big red exercise ball, but my pranking days had just started.

The Ugly Lamp

In the college town of Rexburg, Idaho was an apartment complex called Greenbrier. We lived in Apartment 17 and were good friends with Apartment 5. In Fall 2006 our apartment consisted of Amy Barrus, Lisa Summers, Laurie Summers, Michelle Perroni, Alison Walker, and Carley George. In Apartment 5 lived Jon Boizelle, Jesse Cottam, Luke Cottam, Nathan Mcbride, Elliot Walters, and Jimmy Mitts. Many good times were had, from pranks that failed miserably to just throwing a ball around while sitting and talking in Apartment 5’s living room.


Once when we were visiting Apartment 5, they tried to pawn an ugly lamp off on us. We told them we had our own ugly lamp and we didn’t want theirs. After leaving their apartment, we decided it might be fun to take their ugly lamp and start an ugly lamp collection.

After picking up Apartment 5’s ugly lamp, we went around to all the apartments at Greenbrier asking people for their ugly lamps. Some people were glad to be rid of them—they pulled them out of closets or off of shelves where they had been stashed out of sight. As we left these apartments, they told us they did not want to see their ugly lamp again. Other apartments greedily held on to their ugly lamps and would not let us have them, leaving us confused as to why anyone would want to keep these lamps and a little put off that we couldn’t add them to our collection. Some plots were made to steal the ugly lamps, but they were never put into action.

We ended up with thirteen ugly lamps in all. They were placed on display on the mantle, shelves, and even on placemats on the coffee table. People would come from other apartments to admire our ugly lamps and decide which was the ugliest. No entrance fee was required. We soon had names or distinguishing features to tell our guests about the lamps. The lamp from Apartment Five was so old it once held oil and there was a lamp with a manually retractable cord. Some of the names of the lamps included the Hot Dog Lamp, the Chocolate Lamp, and the Caramel Lamp. We’re pretty sure one of them used to be an old fashioned lamp post.

One of the lamps broke while in our apartment. From the looks of it, this was not the first time it was broken. Elliot said he had a brand new tube of epoxy we could use to fix it. However, we think he didn’t trust us with such a strong bonding agent because he never did let us use it. Luckily, Lisa had a hot glue gun and the lamp was soon restored.

Although many of the lamps didn’t work, we put them to good use. Light bulbs were pilfered to replace the ones that had burnt out in our apartment. When we played village idiot, the idiot would have to wear a lampshade on their head. And of course, ugly lamps are always a great topic of conversation.

Despite the many uses of the ugly lamps, not all of the tenants of Apartment 17 were happy with them. We decided a good way to get rid of them and bring peace back to the apartment would be to return them to where the idea started—apartment 5. It was decided that while the guys were at the priesthood session of general conference, we would take our thirteen ugly lamps and put them in their living room. Unfortunately, we discovered entrance through the living room window cannot be gained in all of the apartments at Greenbrier, even with the help of a butter knife. However, that is another story for another day.

And so the stay of the ugly lamps was lengthened while tempers shortened. It was finally agreed upon that the lamps could stay unto Halloween, then they were gone. We turned the lamps into witches for our Halloween decorations by making dresses out of garbage bags and heads out of balloons. We won the Halloween decorating contest that year.

We did manage to get some of the lamps back to apartment 5 in spite of previous failures. We decided to ask the guys to a girl’s choice dance by making more lamp people and leaving them on the doorstep. When Jesse attempted to return the lamps, we told him not to let his roommates take advantage of him and take those lamps back home with him.

The rest of the ugly lamps were returned to their original owners. By this time, most of the people had gotten used to life without the ugly lamps and didn’t want to return to the former state. Many of the lamps were discarded in the lounge. The saddest fate of them all belongs to the original ugly lamp. It found its way to apartment 6, were it stayed for a time. Then one cold night it was found next to the dumpsters, half buried in snow. Unable to leave it there, Laurie and Lisa carried it back to their apartment one last time.